Mirroring

I have read so many articles and books in the past 3 years about people mirroring each other, but the truth is that your external life mirrors how you feel internally.

I was just journaling as I normally do at the end of my day, and I stumbled upon something very interesting. I was rambling on in my journal about feeling alone, and not having a “family” of my own to build traditions and a life. Of course, this time of year brings these issues to light for a lot of us.

Don’t get me wrong I have lovely friends and extended family that I enjoy so much, but I’m not married and I have a challenging relationship with my children. It leaves me on my own a lot especially during traditional family times.

I don’t need to wait until those things come into my life. I know they will when the time is right. I don’t have to see this alone time as a bad thing and I certainly don’t need to wait to start making plans for my life.

What I’m desiring externally is what I ‘m really craving from myself. I can give myself love, support, and a plan for the future. Things that a relationship and family of my own will fit into.

When all you really want at the end of the day is someone who loves you unconditionally, doesn’t judge you for your mistakes, and allows you to be authentically yourself; you can be that person for yourself. Be your own biggest cheerleader.

Love Yourself

There is a golden rule in Christianity that says “Do unto others that you’d have done to you,” but society has focused on others, and forgotten the part where we must also show ourselves love.

We focus so much on being kind to others and treating them with respect, even if we aren’t treating ourselves that way.

We have to give ourselves the love and kindness we give others. If we aren’t giving it to ourselves first, others won’t either. Like attracts like, it’s one of the universal laws. We show people how to treat us, how to love us.

When there isn’t a balance between loving ourself and others codependency results. I need to prove my love and kindness to others and forsake myself so that I get love and kindness in return.

Instead I would challenge you to give yourself love and kindness first, because then you are practicing the golden rule as it was intended. I love myself therefore I treat others with love and respect.

What are 3 ways you can show yourself love today?

Messages from Spirit

Happy Birthday Otto

Our guardian angels, guides, loved ones, or whatever you chose call them send us messages all the time (especially when we ask for them).

Yesterday during meditation I asked my guides if the were able to give me a sign when I am not being true to myself, as sometimes I don’t even know when I’m doing it. It’s second nature to me to put others first or have flexible boundaries etc.

They said yes of course and told me how they would let me know. It was actually the word Clover that I heard. I thought, okay that’s weird, but I looked up the meaning and it’s not always luck as you’d expect.

Fast forward a day…I had a doctors appointment this afternoon. When I visit this particular doctor I like to check out the bookstore that is nearby. I had actually talked myself out of it and was in the turn lane to go home and I made a last minute choice to go.

I didn’t find anything at the bookstore, but I figured since the pet store was a few doors down that I would pop over and get my dog Otto a special birthday cookie. He turns 5 today!

When I walked down the dog treat aisle I was struck square in the face by a display of dog treats in the shape of a clover!!! It was even the brands name. I was awestruck!

I hear you!!! I’m truly grateful too!!! Keep the messages coming. You can get messages too. Ask and believe!

Believe

In meditation today I asked my guides what message was most import to deliver on my blog today and I was handed a list.

  • Believe in yourself
  • Do everything with intention
  • Love your life
  • Enjoy the journey

Easy right? Is it though? No for most of us. If you are anything like me, you find moments where this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Let’s unpack this to do list shall we.

What does is mean to believe in yourself? It means you have to stop listening to that voice in your head that lists all the reasons why you can’t have what you want (that second piece of chocolate), why you’ve failed every other time (so why even try again), and why you aren’t worthy of the dreams and goals you have for yourself. This will take more than a moment to get control of, but the first step is recognizing the voice. The second is to recognize you are observing the voice say those things, therefore, you are not this voice. You are an observer, this observer is your soul. The true essence of who you are. If you want more information on this concept a good book is The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. When you have discovered the pure essence of who you really are, then it’s easy to believe in yourself.

Next up, Do everything with intention. When you wake up in the morning what is your intention, I bet that most of you don’t even think about this. I know for a fact that I don’t open my eyes and set an intention for the day. Think what a difference it would make if we did. What if you woke up and decided today I am going to be happy. You have a purpose and a goal. When obstacles alight your path, you can make a decision to choose happiness, to change your perspective on what ever comes your way and not let it derail your happiness. Before you walk into that meeting set the intention that you are going to remain focused on the discussions being had in that room, and allow your brain and your mind to be present. Think how much more productive you that meeting would be. When you walk through the door at home after a long hard day, set and intention to be present with your family.

It’s easy to look at your life and see all the flaws. I have a job I don’t like, a house that needs improvements, or crazy relatives that I have to deal with, etc. With a change of perspective you can learn to really love your life, and when you’re ready, make the changes you desire. Instead of looking at the things that aren’t so great, look at all the things you’re grateful for. You may have crazy relatives, but you have the best friends you could ask for. Your house might need improvements, but you have a roof over your head and a bed to sleep in every night. You get the idea. Focus on the places in your life that are abundant and more abundance will follow.

The last thing on the list is to enjoy the journey. It’s important to understand that life is a journey. Nothing stays the same, we start at one point and we will end up at another. During this time we will have experiences, hardships, celebrations, and adventures. We will learn and grow, and our views will change as we age. There is always something new coming into our lives. We cannot control this and we do ourselves a disservice when we try. Embrace the journey, enjoy it. That’s when the magic happens.

Channeled Message – Self Worth/Relationships

A very direct and very important message from the divine source…

Stand your ground in matters of the heart that involve your self worth. Nothing good comes from backing down on this point. It matters that both of you respect and honor each other in all ways. Don’t ever make someone choose between loving you and loving themselves. That is manipulation and is not honorable in any sense. We show people how much we value ourselves by what we will endure from them in a relationship.

This is most important in relationships with our children. You should never put your children in a position where they must chose between their own self worth and their love for you. You should not allow this to happen in front of them either. This is the basis of self worth issues. Don’t manipulate, humiliate, or judge.

Be Honest with Yourself About Your Goals

Are your goals materialistic in nature?  Are they expectations placed on you by family or society, or do they come from your heart? Will they make you happy? Are they attainable?

When I was fresh out of high school my goals were prescribed to me by society and family expectations.  My goals were to go to college (picking a realistic major), have a good business job that afforded me a comfortable living, and to start my own family. 

As I look back now, how shallow that all sounds.  I was completely neglecting the aspects of myself that made my heart sing.  I was neglecting my creative, loving, kind, sensitive side completely.  I was making my family happy, but where was I in all of this?

As I have walked this new spiritual path I have realized that my goals have completely changed. They are no longer material in nature, but soul satisfying.   I don’t really care anymore what society or my family want for me.  My goals are now based on healing my shadows, living a life that balances my internal peace with my external freedom of expression and love.  My goal is to be in the flow, and to use my intuition to guide me and show me where there is work to do.

I have discovered that caring about fitting in with the masses is like chasing your tail.  There’s always something else to want or to be, and you don’t really have a say. I happen to like pumpkin spiced lattes and romantic comedies even though they make me “basic” according to the folks on social media.

So I challenge you to take a look at what you’re striving to become or be.  Is it what makes your heart sing or is it an idea that someone else has decided is right for you? Embrace your authenticity and make your goals something that will grow you as a person.

Love

We are devoted to our dogs and they are devoted to us. We treat them like our babies, and spoil them. We love them unconditionally, because they love us without expectation. It’s easy for us to reciprocate the love our dog gives us. It’s a sure thing. Our dogs love us and we love them back, but it’s different with human relationships isn’t it. But why?

In human relationships there’s always a question of if I give love will it be reciprocated? Society has taught us that love is something that comes with time and checking all the boxes. That isn’t how love works, and that causes confusion and discord in our heart. We begin seeing love as earned, but love just is. What happens when we start seeing self love the same way? We have to earn it?

When does someone become lovable? When do we become lovable? This should never be a question. Love is inherent. We come to this life as an unconditional loving and lovable being. There should never be a question, or criteria for someone to “deserve love.” It’s our birthright. Who are we to decide who is lovable?

So, let’s all take a tip from our canine companions. Let’s see each other and ourselves through the lens of love. There is no criteria or expectation for love, it just is. Allow it to manifest in your life and treat all beings in a loving way.